walking the sacred spiral
walking the sacred spiral
Early in January a dear family member made her transition to the next adventure of life after a long decline. By the time she made her exit she had lost most of her hearing, had cataracts in both eyes and could barely walk. We found out after her death that she also had a large internal mass.
Throughout her dance with extreme old age she was ever loving, graceful and sweet, never complaining or feeling sorry for herself. Her interest in food had declined, and we tried to entice her with various different combinations without much success. She was in her nineties.
At least, if she had been a human being that would have been her age. As it was, Morgan was about 14 1/2 years old. She had been a member of our family all of that time with the exception of the first few weeks of her life. We loved her well, and she loved us.
For those who are not animal lovers and have no experience of them as family members, such a loss seems easily remedied: just get another dog. For us there is no replacing Morgan. We notice her absence daily and we miss her.
If you are one blessed by an animal family member, you know that our non-human relatives are delightful, frustrating, funny, entertaining, inconvenient, worrisome, and precious to us. They contribute richness to our lives in countless ways, and we must honor the process of grieving and releasing them as it flows through us, just as we do with the loss of anyone we hold dear.
We love them through their dying process. We remember them with stories and photographs, laughter and tears. We give their memory a place of honor in our homes. We breathe through the moments when we miss them intensely, shedding tears as they come, and then breathe prayers of gratitude for the years of love we shared.
If you are grieving the passing of a beloved animal, visit the website for the Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement. Along with many other online resources, they provide an extensive list of specialized categories to support you in decision making for end-of-life, suggestions to support children in the grieving process, and a bibliography of other good resources.
Finally, be gentle with yourself and others as you let go and go on.
Making Space for Grief
Monday, March 5, 2012