walking the sacred spiral
walking the sacred spiral
I began my article last week reflecting on the unpredictability of life and death and the importance of bringing our attention and appreciation to home, whatever that means to us.
Since I wrote it, one of our dear household cats has left the physical plane, another went into the veterinary hospital and will return home today, and the other two are more affectionate and needing reassurance than usual.
We are no different. When the life patterns we rely on for stability and comfort shift beneath us, we feel disoriented, fragile, frightened or, at the very least, a bit dizzy.
By nature we all gravitate to patterns that help us feel safe and stable. At the same time, some of our familiar patterns limit us in ways we may mistake for how it has to be even when those patterns cause suffering.
We can talk ourselves out of recovery from all sorts of addictions. We can justify our lack of integrity by saying, “It’s just business!” We can overlook our bad behavior toward our children because our parents did the same thing with us, or we’re under stress, or we were preoccupied. Not one of these things is immune to change.
We can believe we don’t choose to change because we are weak, or “That’s just how it is.” But actually, we are demonstrating an iron will to continue to do what feels familiar, resisting every opportunity to shift, and supporting our stance of immobility with excuses.
It’s easy to see how our cats create problems in their interrelationships by defaulting to certain behaviors. We wish they would shift. It seems, from the outside, that the solution is simple, if only our cats would see that. (Sometimes we have the same opinion about friends or relatives and their problems, don’t we?)
It’s harder to see the solutions when we are enmeshed in our own pattern or habit. We have too much of our identity wrapped up in the behavior to let it go so easily. But in order for our souls to expand and develop, let it go we must.
This is not to imply that all patterns or habits are bad; they aren’t. Many are healthy and supportive things we’ve learned and cultivated. They are talents we’ve developed, or abilities we have honed.
It’s when our behavior is causing us–and others around us–pain that the clues are there: it’s time to be brave. Take a risk. Let go. Find out what else is available to us.
This usually feels like a loss, and it does need to be grieved. When we get on the other side of it and feel the blessings of the change, the grieving begins to be completed and we find ourselves, instead, in a field of gratitude.
At each new phase of life we let something go and we grow into something new. Would you want to be 14 again today? How about 30? We can’t keep the body we had then either.
This past week a man asked me why he was questioning the existence of a benevolent power in the universe as he aged, rather than deepening in faith. Wasn’t that how it was supposed to be–as we age we grow in faith?
My answer was that perhaps our generation has become so identified with our bodies that we forget these limiting space suits we inhabit also have a limited span of usefulness. But we are not our bodies. Our span of existence isn’t limited to what our bodies can do today or tomorrow.
If they show signs of wear and tear, and are able to do less than they once could, we may feel the promise of eternality just couldn’t be real. We’ve confused who we are with what they are.
The limitations of form are temporary, just as the forms are. Once liberated from form, their particular limitations ceased to bind us. We discover just how whole we’ve always been. That is what I believe. You, I’m sure, have your own beliefs about all this.
What patterns are supporting your life in a wonderful way today? Are there any that really aren’t doing that, but doing the opposite and making you (or other people) miserable?
It may be time for those habit patterns to die. Don’t confuse them with you. They’re only patterns. You are an expression of the Infinite Presence, the Supreme Mystery, or God. Patterns are meant to change. If yours are squeezing you, it’s time for a change. Find out more about who you really are.
A Change Will Do You Good
Tuesday, August 19, 2014